Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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