Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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