so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Randomize
