I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
