Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize