we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
BRING THE BAGELS
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
