he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize
