he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Randomize
