so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
There was a lot of him and a little penis
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
You are a genius and a whore.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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