Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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