this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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