Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
