Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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