I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
We named our party play list daddy issues
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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