I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
