hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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