i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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