When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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