He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
