I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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