Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
