try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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