She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
no. you can't hotbox the world.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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