He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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