I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
