No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
