Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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