I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
