You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Randomize
