I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
