I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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