i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
