My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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