If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
