it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
