i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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