break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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