TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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