I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
