plz talk dirty to me
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
