small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Randomize
