I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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