There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
