hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
