Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
