My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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