I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
