I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
