her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
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