she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
