i was born a porn star she said
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
